Just clearing my head...
I must say, I'm quite impressed with all this updating that's going on! Nice job ladies. Now that wasn't so hard, was it?Dad update: from bad to worse. We have placed him on morphine and have made the decision to stop the dialysis. He was in an extreme amount of pain from about Friday on. He's now resting comfortably, thank God. The doctor said 7-10 days before this would all be over. I can't decide if I want it to come sooner or later. The rock-hard burning in the pit in my stomach and almost uncontrollable urge to vomit is a constant knawing feeling.
Younger Sister and I were trying to make some decisions about pallbearers and music. Most of Dad's friends are every bit as old as him and probably every bit as unhealthy. Then there's the music.. the funeral home asked us about Dad's favorite song. I told YS that Burning Ring of Fire probably wasn't exactly what they had in mind. We both cracked up. (You have to know us.) When my Mom passed away, we all filed into the church - front and center - only to sit down and have Oldest Sisters Husbands key chain go off and say "you're an asshole." I don't need to tell you about the tear jolting laughter that brought. So, if we busted into a grove at Burning Ring of Fire Dad would just roll his eyes, shake his head and say yep, those are my kids. Then YS tells me about a friend of hers that went to a funeral. As the pallbearers were carrying the casket, the handle fell off. I'm not kidding you, and yes, I'm cracking up. What in the hell would you do then?? But, the funeral director has promised us that this won't happen. It's a good thing for many reasons, but mostly because we'd be rolling on the floor laughing and be unable to stop. We're some sick folk huh, and Prettiest Cousin couldn't more proud to be related!
Needless to say, the "don't wanna go" business trip has been cancelled. I sure wish it was for something fun and wonderful like winning the lottery. At this point, I'll just be glad when it's over. The hurry up and wait is driving us all mad.
Just to clue you in about what no sleep and the endless emotional roller coaster will do for you - I paid bills last night and being the cheap chick I am, I like to hand-deliver the ones I can save the stamp on. So, I drop off the utility bill, cell phone bill and then the cable bill. The problem was, when I got home the cable bill was on the bar. Oopps - I hand delivered my credit card payment to the cable office. Younger Sisters husband was kind enough to go there and retrieve it this morning, explaining that his Sister-In-Law was under a lot of stress right now. What a trooper..
Prettiest Cousin has mailed me the hand made just for you jewlery. Can't wait to see it! Since business trip is postponed, I'll have plenty of time to shop for clothes to match. Love that!
Date update: he's been very kind. He's not really sure what to say to me given the present impending situation. But he's trying to be very supportive. Can't really ask for more than that.
Did some yard work this weekend and much house cleaning. I don't want the house to look the same way I feel when people start stopping by.
Better wrap this up and get ready to go to job #2.
Remember to tell those who you love how you feel before it's too late. We're not promised tomorrow. So, with that in mind - a huge hug and love yous to my online friends. Especially you, Prettiest Cousin.
Have a super evening.
� grizmom at
2005-08-08
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